Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Larissa, You're So Vain, You Probably Think This Post Is About You

While C is out of the office, i have no one to tell my stories to. So i'll have to tell them here.

Yesterday, Wesley came in and awkwardly visited me for a while. Also, he may have taken a picture of me with his phone. We should check his background and see if it's still you or if it's switched to me.

My food stash in my desk is running low. I need to buy more peanut butter m'n'ms and Pringles. Also, i worked out yesterday and now my abs hurt. Boo.

KP has me doing more grading projects for her. We should totally start a grading business for professors and local teachers. We could make bank. We can work up a business plan while you're in Mongolia and then launch it when you get back.

I feel like i had another story to tell you, but maybe i was hallucinating. I need a nap.

I hate it when people call/come into the office and have no idea who they need to talk to.
"Um, I got a letter from someone about something, so . . . can you do that?"
What? No. Read the letter again. See if there is any helpful information in there anywhere. Even one word, like "account" or "schedule" could be enormously helpful. You really don't remember anything? How have you managed to stay alive this long, let alone get into college? Please step away from my desk before i cut you.

Four o'clock. This is what my ex used to call the "power hour". He was dumb. This is also when you usually drift over to my desk to see how i am killing time in the last hour. Usually, i'm reading blogs, Facebook chatting with my boyfriend, or doing homework. Today i would probably complain to you about how my abs hurt and i should never have started working out again. Because they do, and i shouldn't have. Let's be honest: i'm already as hot as anyone could ever be, right? What's the point of working out?

Someone in my office was wearing jeans and Uggs today. I think it's perfectly acceptable for you and i to relax our dress code a little.

I really want to have a tea party one day. Mostly because my dad gave me this hand-me-down tea set and i haven't really had a chance to use it. Let's have a tea party with little elegant cakes and big flowered hats when the weather gets warmer. We can have it on my porch. Because Beer Street is the epitome of class and sophistication.

Okay, it's almost 5:00. Damn, this was a boring day at work. Please come back and be bored with me? Kthanx.

Wednesday:

You'd better have some great stories from this trip. All i want is for all of your decisions in life to pan out positively for me, in terms of entertainment and vicarious thrills. Is that too much to ask? Please keep in mind that if you tell me interesting stories, i might blog them. And it will be almost like you're famous. I mean, not really, because i would steal the story and not give you any credit, and anyway i only have like five readers, but it's something, right?

My abs still hurt from working out on Monday. This is Wednesday. This is why i never work out. Except that i did lunges today, but whatever. My legs are fine.

Wesley just brought me a fax and asked where to sign up for a campus tour.

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